A farmer and his bride are riding home in a wagon pulled by a team of horses, when the older horse stumbles. The farmer says, "That's once." A little further along, the horse stumbles again. The farmer says, "That's twice." When the old horse stumbles a third time, the farmer quietly reaches under his seat, pulls out a shotgun, and shoots the horse dead. His brand new bride yells, "That was an awful thing to do!" The farmer says: "That's once." The beginning of this week’s… Read More » |
Parasha Insights
IS THERE G-D IN EVERY PERSON?
THE POWER OF ONE ACT
Judge: Is there any reason you cannot serve as a juror in this case? Juror: I don't want to be away from my job for so long. Judge: Can't they do without you at work? Juror: Yes, but I don't want them to know it. 1914 is when World War I began in our times, but the first World War really happened 3,500 years earlier. It is related in this week’s portion of Lech Lecha. Nine kings and their empires were involved in a ferocious and bloody battle. Yet, somehow the Jew became a central player. Throughout… Read More » |
THE REVOLUTIONARY MAN
A Jewish immigrant who arrived during the war needed to renew his immigration status several years later. He was asked by a clerk to give the date of his immigration. Not knowing the language and getting confused with the numbers, he wanted to say 1941. Instead he said 1491. The clerk, who was also a Jew, tells him: Ah! It’s a pity. You could have waited one year and arrived with Columbus! This week in Parshat Noach, we meet the first Jew of all time, Abraham. But why was Abraham the first to earn that moniker? … Read More » |
UPS AND DOWNS IN LIFE
You might have heard of the MC who introduced the guest speaker: “Our speaker needs no introduction. What he needs is a conclusion.” We all need conclusions. And that is what matters most. What is our conclusion? “And there was morning; and there was day; and there was light.” Most countries in our industrialized world have accepted midnight as the beginning of our 24-hour day. The current world calendar thus begins the counting of "days" with about six hours of darkness followed by twe… Read More » |
Are you a Successful Man?
Barry announces to his wife Sylvia: “I am going to go away for the weekend to take a course to enhance our marriage.” His wife asks, “A course on what?” Barry says, “Unconditional Love.” Sylvia is delighted: “Please please go. I can't wait for you to return!” Barry goes and returns a week later. Sylvia asks, “Nu? So what did you learn?” Barry says: “If you give me Unconditional Love, I'll give you Unconditional Love!” In the prayers during … Read More » |