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Parasha Insights

The Capitol Dome in Washington, DC?

An old man was interviewed by a newspaper reporter on his 100th birthday. He was asked: “To what do you attribute your longevity?”

The man thought for a moment and began ticking off items on his fingers: “I never smoke, I never drink liquor, I never overeat, and I always go to bed early and get up early.”

“You know,” said the reporter, “I had an uncle who did all those things, but he only lived to be 90. How do you explain that?”

“Simple,” said the old man. “He just didn't keep it up long enough.”

One of the most beautiful and awe-inspiring sights in Washington DC is the United States Capitol building.

150 years ago, though, most of the nation opposed… Read More »


An anxious man filed a "missing persons" report about his wife. She had gone shopping earlier that day, and hadn't yet come back.

Officer: What is her height? Husband: I never checked.

Officer: Slim or robust? Husband: Not slim.

Officer: Petite or large? Husband: Not petite.

Officer: Color of eyes? Husband: Never noticed.

Officer: Color of hair? Husband: Well, that changes according to season.

Officer: What was she wearing? Husband: Not sure, a dress or a suit.

Officer: What color? Husband: How would I remember?

Officer: Was she driving? Husband: Yes.

Officer: Color of the car? Husband: It was a black Audi A8 with supercharged 3.0 litre V6 engine generating 333 horsepower, teamed with an eight-speed tiptronic automatic… Read More »


There are two kinds of people: Those who can count, and those who can’t.

There is something strange about the way we count Sefirah—the 49 days between Passover and Shavuot.

What is this counting all about? What is the point of counting days and weeks that will pass, regardless of our counting? The truth is, we are counting from the day we were set free from decades of slavery, on Passover, to the day we received the Torah at Sinai and made our covenant with G-d to accept His Torah as our eternal mandate and blueprint; from the day we became a people to the day we received our Jewish identity. We include both days andweeks in our Sefirah count to highlight the two ways of defining our Jewish identity.

The 24-hour day… Read More »


No dictionary has ever been able to satisfactorily define the difference between "complete" and "finished." However, during a recent linguistic conference, held in London, England, and attended by some of the best linguists in the world, Samsundar Balgobin, a Guyanese linguist, was the presenter when he was asked to make that very distinction.

The question put to him by a colleague in the erudite audience was this: “Some say there is no difference between ‘complete’ and ‘finished.’ 

Please explain the difference in a way that is easy to understand.”

Mr. Balgobin’s response: “When you marry the right woman, you are ‘complete.’  If you… Read More »


 One day, a tax inspector knocked on the door of Izzy's deli in London. "How did you deduct $80,000 for business travel! Your returns say that you and your wife went on 28 business trips to Israel, the USA, Italy, Switzerland, France, Hawaii, and the Caribbean! What is going on?"

Izzy smiled. "We deliver!"

One verse in this week's Torah portion, Acharei Mot-Kedoshim, represents a wonderful truth about Judaism: You shall observe My statutes and My ordinances, which a man shall do and live by them. I am the Lord.

The Talmud expounds, " Live by them," not die. The word's significance cannot be underestimated. Some religions still equate G-d with a fascination with death. Radical Muslims… Read More »

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