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Parasha Insights

WHEN IS REAL TIME?

A talented artist asked his gallery owner if anyone had shown interest in his paintings.

"I've got good news and bad news," she said. "The good news is that some guy inquired if your work will appreciate in value after you die. When I told him that it would, he bought all 15 of your original paintings. He spent 4.9 million dollars on your paintings."

“That’s awesome,” exclaims the artist. “I can now retire in wealth. And the bad news?"

"That guy was your doctor."

There is a fascinating Mishnah studied on this Shabbat—in chapter five of Ethics of the Fathers:

“Ten things were created at twilight of Shabbat eve,” We study in Ethics of… Read More »

ARE YOU A “DAY-JEW” OR A “WEEK-JEW”?

An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again. The boy asked his father, "What is this, Father?" The father responded, "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is."

While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed an old lady in a wheelchair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. 

The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched small circles of lights w/numbers above the walls light up. They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse… Read More »

DOES YOUR LIFE BELONG TO YOU?

A Gabbai approaches a guest in the shul and says, "I want to give you an Aliyah. What is your name?"  The man answers, "Esther ben Moshe."

The Gabbai says, "No, I need your name."

"It's Esther ben Moshe," the man says.

"How can that be your name?"

The man answers, "I've been having financial problems, so everything is in my wife's name."

It is a very strange Torah law—in fact, it borders on the absurd:

The Torah tells us, in this week’s portion Emor about the ancient Jewish legal processes, which included capital punishment for certain serious crimes, like murder and other extremely severe crimes. It states that such punishment can only be applied when… Read More »

DO YOU HAVE TO JUDGE ME?

At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. "Isn't it true," he bellowed, "that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?"

The witness stared out the window as though he hadn't heard the question.

"Isn't it true that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?" the lawyer repeated.

The witness still did not respond.

Finally, the judge leaned over and said, "Sir, please answer the question."

"Oh," the startled witness said, "I thought he was talking to you."

This week's portion Kedoshim contains a positive The biblical commandment, which we often do not think about as such:

With Justice, you… Read More »

WE ARE STRONG

"We are STRONG. We are UNITED. They CAN'T BREAK US." These were Rabbi Yisroel Goldstein's words to his congregation last Shabbat as the terror attack was taking place at Chabad of Poway.

In response to this horrific attack let's #ShareShabbat, this Shabbat I encourage all to make an extra effort and come to services beginning at 9:30 AM followed by a Kiddush at approximately noon.

Please rest assured that we have taken extra security measures to secure our facility and all who attend services. May the Almighty protect all of us and the world at large. 

As the Jewish world grieves for the heinous terror attack on Chabad of Poway, last Shabbat, April 27, 2019; as we are alarmed and… Read More »

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