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Parasha Insights

The Shell Or The Fruit?

Three contractors were visiting a tourist attraction on the same day. One was from New York, another from Texas, and the third from Florida.  

At the end of the tour, the guard asked them what they did for a living. When they all replied that they were contractors, the guard said, "Hey, we need one of the rear fences redone. Why don't you guys take a look at it and give me a bid?" So, off they went to check it out.  

First to step up was the Florida contractor. He took out his tape measure and pencil, did some measuring, and said, "Well, I figure the job will run about $900. $400 for materials, $400 for my crew, and $100 profit for me."  

Next was the Texas contractor. He also t… Read More »

CAN THE MIRROR BE HOLY?

A man comes to his rabbi. I need a job, Rabbi. I can become a dancer or a singer. Which one should I choose?  

The Rabbi says: Become a dancer. 
Why, rabbi, have you seen me dance? 
No, says the Rabbi, but I have heard you sing!... 

One of the most integral items in the Tabernacle was the Washstand, from which the Kohanim—the priests—would wash their hands and feet each morning. This was the necessary preparation for each day’s service and was called ‘the sanctification of the Kohanim’ meaning it made those already holy yet holier.  

But what was the washstand itself made of? Not gold, silver, or wood—as most of the other vessels in the Sanctuary… Read More »

WILL YOU BE SILENT NOW?

Once there was a millionaire, who collected alligators. He kept them in the pool in the back of his mansion. The millionaire also had a beautiful single daughter. One day, the millionaire decides to throw a huge party, and during the party he announces, "My dear guests, I have a proposition to every man here. I will give one million dollars, or my daughter, to the man who can swim across this pool full of alligators and emerge unharmed!" As soon as he finished his last word, there was the sound of a large splash in the pool. The guy in the pool was swimming with all his might, and the crowd began to cheer him on. Finally, he made it to the other side of the pool unharmed.  

The millionaire … Read More »

WHY DO YOU HATE?

Iranian president calls Trump and tells him, I had a wonderful dream last night. I could see America, the beautiful country, and on each house, I saw a banner."

"What did it say on the banners?" Trump asks. Mahmud replies, "UNITED STATES OF IRAN."

Trump says, "You know, Mahmud, I am happy you called, because believe it or not, last night I had a similar dream. I could see all of Tehran, and it was more beautiful than ever, and on each house flew an enormous banner."

"What did it say on the banners?" Mahmud asks. Trump replies, "I don't know. I can't read Hebrew."

Iran is in the news again, just as it was 2300 years ago, in the days of Purim. Then his name was Haman; today his n… Read More »

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