WHAT IS MY PURPOSE HERE?

Tomorrow Friday, December 22, 2023, marks the tenth day of the Hebrew month of Tevet. The tenth of Tevet is a fast day that commemorates the beginning of the siege against Jerusalem that concluded with the destruction of the Temple on Tisha B’av. The fast is observed from daybreak until nightfall. In New York, the fast begins at 5:30 a.m. and ends at 5:04 p.m. We break the fast with the Kiddush of Friday night followed by a Shabbat Dinner.

The story of Joseph revealing himself to his brothers after decades of bitter separation is one of the most dramatic in the entire Torah. Twenty-two years earlier, when Joseph was seventeen years old, his brothers loathing their younger kin, abducted him, threw him into a pit, and then sold him as a slave to Egyptian merchants. In Egypt, he spent twelve years in prison, from where he rose to become viceroy of the country that was the superpower at the time. Now, more than two decades later, the moment was finally ripe for reconciliation.

Where do you belong? Where is home for you? Is home where your body resides or where your soul wants to be? As Jews, we are only at home in a holy land. Yet, most Jews live in the diaspora all over the world. So, for those of us who live in the diaspora, are we at home?

Joseph had lived in Egypt for twenty-two years. When his brothers arrived, they did not recognize him. When they last saw him, he was a child, now, he was an adult. But more importantly, when they last saw him, he looked like a Jew and now he looked like an Egyptian.

On the surface, he dressed, talked, and behaved like an Egyptian. But deep inside burned a passionate soul on fire with love for G-d. The brothers did not see the inside. They only saw the surface and thought they were dealing with an Egyptian. They did not recognize their brother.

Joseph finally revealed his identity and said, “I am Joseph,” but they were so startled that they couldn’t respond.

When Joseph revealed his identity, the brothers realized that all this time they were only seeing the external Joseph, not the true one. They thought they were interacting with the gentile Prime Minister of Egypt when in reality he was their brother. Suddenly they realized that their vantage point of reality was external. They were completely deceived by their eyes.

This opened them up to yet a deeper painful truth: They never knew their brother. Even when they saw him, they never really knew him.

The words “I am Joseph your brother – it is I whom you sold into Egypt” in the original Hebrew can also be translated as “I am Joseph your brother – because you sold me into Egypt.” What Joseph was stating was something incredibly powerful. I am the person I am today only because you sold me into Egyptian slavery.

The brothers were trying to harm him, they separated him from his beloved father and family, and he endured much torment and pain. Yet at this profound moment of healing Joseph can look at his life and say to his brothers: “Now, be not distressed, nor reproach yourself for having sold me here, for it was to be a provider that G-d sent me ahead of you… G-d has sent me ahead of you to ensure your survival in the land and to sustain you for a momentous deliverance.”

Joseph said I am not an Egyptian. I don’t belong in this immoral land. I don’t want to be here. This is not my home. My home is in the holy land. My heart pulsates and beats with Judaism. I belong in Israel and am only here for a purpose.

In practical terms, Joseph’s mission was to pave the way for the Jewish people’s entry into Egypt and, more importantly, their eventual redemption. That was Joseph’s only reason for being in Egypt. Though he looked comfortable, he wasn’t.  He was in Egypt, but his heart was in Israel.

Just like the brothers, many of us, too, live our lives thinking “If only…” If only my circumstances had been different; if only I had been born into a different type of family, if only I would have had a better personality. If only I would have treated my spouse or children differently; if only I would not have been abused; if only I would not have this mental or emotional challenge, if only I would not have this insecurity.

Yes, you may sob. It is painful. Sad. Tough. But then take a deep breath. Surrender your expectations. Allow yourself to entertain the idea that the individual journey of your life, in all of its ups and downs, is what will ultimately allow you to discover your unique mission in this world and impart your singular light to the cosmos. Can you discover deep in your heart that the mistakes you made are somehow part of a plan that will allow more light to come into the world?

Our mission is to make this place holier, gentler, and kinder by modeling our Jewish values. To be successful, we need to speak the language and look the part. On the surface, we are just like everyone, but deep down, we are different.

On January 1, 2020, a short time before the Corona outbreak, I attended a gathering of 90,000 fellow Jews, at MetLife Stadium, in New Jersey. They all united to celebrate the completion of a seven-year cycle of studying the 2,711 pages of the Talmud, known as Daf Yomi.

At the mass event, I noticed Jews, men, and women, of all ages. But my heart swelled with tears and pride as I noticed one Jew, close to 100, an Auschwitz survivor, who attended the celebration together with four generations of descendants. I noticed some other twenty Holocaust survivors dancing together in MetLife. It was the classic Jewish "revenge" against Nazi Germany.

The chairman of the event, Mr. Sol Werdiger, shared with me an incredible story. Sol is the Founder & CEO of Outerstuff, the leading designer, manufacturer, and marketer of children’s sports apparel for the major sports leagues in North America. Sol is a well-known activist and philanthropist in New York, who also serves as chairman of the Siyum Hashas.

“I never knew why G-d put me into this type of business, when I have no interest in sports, and can barely name ten players of the major sports leagues.

“But nine years ago, we needed a location to house 90,000 Jews who have studied Talmud for over seven years. And that is when the idea popped into my mind: Let’s do it at MetLife.

“MetLife Stadium is an American sports stadium located at the Meadowlands Sports Complex in East Rutherford, New Jersey, 8 miles west of New York City. It is the home stadium of two National Football League (NFL) franchises, the New York Giants and the New York Jets, as well as the New York Guardians of the XFL. At an approximate cost of $1.6 billion, it was the most expensive stadium ever built at the time that it opened, in 2010.

“My friends thought I was crazy, but I called the owners of Metlife, some of them nice Jewish boys (Mr. Tisch and Mr. Johnson), and they agreed to give it to us for the Siyum Hashas.

“We came to a final meeting, where we would sign the contract and finalize the deal. At the meeting, a man stood up and said he wanted to say a few words. He introduced himself as the man who designed and built the stadium for Mr. Tisch and Johnson, a project which cost them 1.6 billion dollars.

This is what he said at the meeting:

“It took me ten years to design and build MetLife. As I got older, I began to become more introspective. And I started to ask myself what the purpose of my life was, what did I achieve in all my years. A sense of emptiness came over me. I dedicated ten full years to building a stadium, for what? What was its ultimate meaning? Is this the reason my soul came down to this world? Was this worth ten years of my life and 1.6 billion dollars?

“For those ten years, I did not do much more. And I was feeling remorse. I am a Jew, and my soul was yearning for real meaning…

“But when I hear today that my stadium will be used to house 90,000 Jews, praying and learning Torah together, dancing, and celebrating their Judaism, uniting together against anti-Semitism and bigotry, committing themselves to bring the light of Torah into the world— I say: Ah, now I know why I spent ten years and 1.6 billion building this gigantic stadium!”

We need to let go of the notion that life must look a certain way. G-d’s plans are mysterious, and every step in our arduous journeys is there to help each of us cast our unique infinite light on the world.

Shabbat Shalom,

Rabbi Yoseph Geisinsky