A man comes to his rabbi. I need a job, Rabbi. I can become a dancer or a singer. Which one should I choose?
The Rabbi says: Become a dancer.
Why, rabbi, have you seen me dance?
No, says the Rabbi, but I have heard you sing!...
One of the most integral items in the Tabernacle was the Washstand, from which the Kohanim—the priests—would wash their hands and feet each morning. This was the necessary preparation for each day’s service and was called ‘the sanctification of the Kohanim’ meaning it made those already holy yet holier.
But what was the washstand itself made of? Not gold, silver, or wood—as most of the other vessels in the Sanctuary. But rather from women’s mirrors. This is how the Torah described it in this cryptic verse, which gave rise to a fascinating debate on the nature of intimacy in Jewish life.
“Betzalel made the copper washstand and its copper base out of the mirrors of the dedicated women who congregated at the entrance of the Communion Tent.”
This seems strange. While all other components of the Sanctuary were built from a combination of diverse contributions, it was the washing basin that was made exclusively from women’s donations, and not only any donations but from mirrors. Why? What is more, the washstand was designated to purify the priests and cleanse their hands and feet each morning before entering the Sanctuary. Why this vessel designated for cleansing would be built exclusively from women’s mirrors is perplexing.
But amongst Israel, there were women who decided to serve G-d [in a very intense and sincere fashion], and they distanced themselves from the temptations of this world and gave away their mirrors as a donation because they no longer had the need to beautify themselves.
Israelite women owned mirrors, which they would look into when they adorned themselves. Even these [mirrors] did not hold back from bringing a contribution toward the Mishkan, but Moses rejected them because they were made for temptation.
The Holy One, blessed is He, said to Moshe, “Accept [them], for these are more precious to Me than anything because through them the women gave birth to many children in Egypt.” The story is this. The Egyptians sought not merely to enslave, but also to put an end to, the people of Israel. One way of doing so was to kill all male children. Another was simply to interrupt normal family life. The people, both men and women, were laboring all day. At night, says the Midrash, they were forbidden to return home. They slept where they worked. The intention was to destroy both privacy and desire so that the Israelites would have no more children.
The women realized this and decided to frustrate Pharaoh’s plan. They used mirrors to make themselves attractive to their husbands. The result was that intimate relations resumed. The women conceived and had children. Only because of this was there a new generation of Jewish children. The women, by their faith, courage, and ingenuity, secured Jewish survival.
The Midrash continues that when Moses commanded the Israelites to bring offerings to make the Tabernacle, some brought gold, some silver, some bronze, and some jewels. But many women had nothing of value to contribute except the mirrors they had brought from Egypt. These they brought to Moses, who recoiled in disgust. What, he thought, have these cheap objects, used by women to make themselves look attractive, to do with the sanctuary and the sacred? G-d tells Moses to accept them, saying mirrors are the most precious contribution!
To ask the question more poignantly, what was the so-called disagreement between Moses and G-d? What was Moses thinking? And why did G-d reject his view?
Why did G-d feel that these mirrors should be used in the Sanctuary, but should constitute the washing basin from which the Priests cleansed themselves daily?
We are exposed here to one of the most fascinating debates in the history of religion and philosophy.
Where intimacy is, there is G-d. In intimacy mortal man comes closest to transcending the finiteness and temporariness of his or her humaneness and touching infinity and eternity, bridging the endless chasm between man and G- d, because it is through that act that we can become G-dlike and create life. It is the one opportunity man has to “taste” G-d – to think as He thinks, feel as He feels, to create as He creates. In intimacy, we stand face-to-face with G-d. It is our single opportunity to become G-d-like and perform the astounding miracle of creation, fusing a seed and an egg to craft a new life. This life will in turn create another life, for eternity.
Thus, Judaism sees intimacy as potentially the holiest and purest human endeavor. Indeed, the most sacred chamber of the Jerusalem Temple, known as the “holy of holies,” is described in the Bible as “the bedroom,” and in it lie the Ark containing the ten commandments atop which were sculpted two faces of a boy and a girl gazing at each other. The Zohar declares: that G-d can only be found in the space where females and males unite.
This is what Rabbi Akiva meant when he said that the Song of Songs turned the world into a worthwhile place. Till the Song of Songs was given to Israel the world could be seen as a vile reality. Plato’s dualism, conferring holiness upon the spiritual and corruption upon the physical, reflected the prevailing attitude
We have been taught to see G-d as the great spoilsport of human relations, not its inventor, and the Torah as the great taboo on free Eros, not its grand supporter. This is a mistake. In Judaism, the value and mystique of intimacy has reached unprecedented heights, and its full and liberated expression enormous validation, and sanctification. Sexuality, Judaism teaches, is the yearning to reunite man and woman who were initially created as one in the image of God, as Genesis states, “G-d created Man in His image, in the image of G-d He created him; male and female He created them.” This is why the washing stand, which served to purify and sanctify the Priests, was precisely built from the mirrors used for sacred intimacy— an intimacy that has created a generation of Jews in the horrific conditions of Egyptian exile.
Sexuality, then, is the holy of holies of the human experience, and it needs to be treated that way: With awe, reverence, and profound sensitivity. Children need to feel the sacredness with which their parents regard intimacy. Then, when they grow older, they will treat their intimacy with the Divine respect it deserves.
Intimacy in our age has become so prevalent and free, that it has depleted its sacred mystique; and stripped its true power and meaning. Now, when couples get married, they often struggle to find excitement and wholesomeness in their intimacy which has often been cheapened through years of hollow use.
Alas, our society needs a second “sexual revolution,” from free sex to sacred sex.
Moses believes that closeness to G-d is about celibacy and purity. G-d teaches him otherwise, that passionate love, when offered as a gift to G-d, is the most precious love of all. This is the love we read about in Shir haShirim, the Song of Songs. Sure, Moses's view is still important: there are moments when we are called on to challenge ourselves and disengage from our physical desires to cultivate our sensitivity to the sublime. If we do not know how to sometimes say “no” to our bodies, we can lose control and perspective. But this is not to take us away from the physical but rather to allow our physical relationships to reflect the full depth and majesty that our relationships are capable of attaining.
Shabbat Shalom,
Rabbi Yoseph Geisinsky
Diana Margaret wrote...