A recently divorced woman is walking along the beach contemplating how badly treated she got over the divorce settlement, when she spies a magic lamp washing up onshore. She rubs the lamp, and out pops a magical genie!
The genie notices her anger and lets her vent her troubles to him. As a consolation, the genie informs her that he will give her three wishes. But, he cautions her that because he does not believe in divorce, he will give her ex-husband ten times the amount of whatever she wishes.
The woman is steaming mad, thinking that this is hardly fair, but she makes her first wish. The first wish was for a billion dollars. The genie grants her wish and she finds herself sitting in pile of one billion one-dollar bills. The genie then reminds her that her husband is now the recipient of 10 billion dollars.
The woman can barely contain her anger when she makes her second wish. The second wish was for a beautiful mansion on the shore of her own private beach. In an instant it was granted, but the genie then reminds again that her ex-husband now owns ten of what she wished for, and points out at the beach to a small development of ten such mansions.
Upon hearing this, the woman takes her time to contemplate her last wish. Just as the genie was about to give up on her, the woman informs the genie that she wants to make the last wish. But, before she can do this, the genie again warns her that her ex-husband will get ten times what she wishes for.
"No problem," said the woman as she grinned in ecstasy. "For my last wish... I'd like to give birth to twins.”
Here is my question friends: Which lane do you usually drive in while on the highway? Are you a “middle lane” personality, traveling not too fast, and not too slow, or do you find yourself often in the more extreme right or left lanes? Who do you agree with? Maimonides who tells us to follow the middle road, or the Kotzker Rebbe who says that the middle of the road was made for horses? Should we always remain in the middle, never taking any emotion, quality, disposition, position or perspective to the extreme? Or maybe we should sometimes embrace one side with single-minded fire?
The Jewish answer, Both views are correct, because they are not talking about the same thing. The “Golden Mean” and the “Horse’s Path” are not the same “middle of the road.”
The Midrashtells us that the father. of Abraham and Horon Terach complained about Abram his son before Nimrod the King of Babylonia, for crushing his idols; sothe King cast Abram into a fiery furnace.
Haran sat and thought, “If Abram is victorious, I am on his side, and if Nimrod is victorious, I am on his side.” When Abram was saved, they said to Haran, “Whose side are you on?” Haran said to them, “I am on Abram’s side!” They cast him into the fiery furnace and he was burned.
Haran was torn between two sides. On one side stood his lone brother, Abraham, who embraced and taught that the universe had a single Creator and hence a unified purpose. On the other side stood the entire society, led by Nimrod, who believed that the universe was a capricious battlefield between scores of gods. Whom do you follow? Haran, pragmatically, decided he would follow the victor. Yet tragically, his indecisiveness led to his death.
He was always right in the “middle.”He always saw the two sides of every matter and could not come to a decisive decision.
You know the guy who once said: “I once asked someone, have you seen www.indecisive.com? His response: Yes and no.
Haran is a “fence-sitter.” He is the “father of ambivalence” Never sure who is right, he plays it safe. He is afraid to take a real position.
You know about the guy who was called upon for an opinion of a friend who was extremely lazy. He didn’t want to lie, but he also didn’t want to risk losing even a lazy friend. So he said this with utmost sincerity: "In my opinion, you will be very fortunate to get this person to work for you."
Aaron, the brother of Moses the Midrash relates, was the great Jewish mediator. He brought enemies together; he made peace between quarreling couples; he resolved many a conflict in the Jewish community. He achieved this by not taking sides, or going to the extreme, but by walking “in the middle of the road” and thus bridging opposing personalities and conflicting opinions.
There are two paths, both of which go in the middle, yet they vary in their very essence. The “golden mean” and the “horses’ path” are not at all identical. The horses’ path is the average between extremes, ultimately a result of the lack of confidence. People who always wanting to please everyone, and at the end pleasing no one. Their only position is: Don’t take a position. Their only truth is: there is no truth.
The golden mean walks in the middle not because it is afraid of extremes, but because it represents the merging of extremes. Maimonides’ “middle path” is designated for spirits who are full of true passion and great enthusiasm; yet because they have broad minds, large souls and big hearts, they appreciate the diversity of perspective. They always see the bigger picture and don’t get stuck in one vantage point. As a result, they can relate to both parties quarreling and discover harmonious ground where enemies can learn to resolve conflict.
In this week’s portion, in Lech Lecha: “The fugitive came and told Abraham the Ivri,”
It means “on the other side.” Why was Abraham called “on the other side?” The Rabbis answer: “Because the whole world was on one side while Abraham was on the opposite side.” To be a Jew means to profess the courage to be “on the other side” of the entire world.
Shabbat Shalom,
Rabbi Yoseph Geisinsky