WHO IS A CONDUIT FOR BLESSINGS?

One Shabbat morning Schwartz strides angrily into shul and confronts Goldberg, during prayers: Goldberg is A THIEF! Goldberg is mortified and he exits the shul, shaking with humiliation. After the kiddush club, the rabbi wants a word with Schwartz, and once the assembled kiddush-makers have gone into lunch, the rabbi gently and firmly tells Schwartz that he has crossed a line with his public charge against Goldberg. Accusing a fellow friend of being a thief is no small matter.

Beyond that, public humiliation is simply unacceptable. “Next Shabbat, when everyone has arrived in shul, you must publicly retract your accusation.” During the week, the rabbi reassures Goldberg that matters would be set right. It’s Shabbat morning. A nervous Goldberg spots Schwartz in shul. It had taken him days to recover from that horrible outburst. But he’s hopeful. After all, the rabbi promised him he’d talk some sense into Schwartz. Right before Musaf begins, Schwartz saunters over to Goldberg - and you know everybody is watching and waiting - and Schwartz loudly proclaims:

So, Goldberg is not a thief?!

The shul is roaring with commotion. It takes several moments of the gabba’im pounding on the table and urging the congregants to calm down. Goldberg is enraged, and he flees the scene once again. Kiddush club is drained of its usual banter and good cheer; people hastily down their glasses and hurry to lunch. By the look on the rabbi’s face, Schwartz knows the next scene. And the rabbi is most disappointed: I told you to retract your accusation against Goldberg publicly.

What did you do today? Now it’s even worse!

Schwartz replies: You heard my every word Goldberg is not a thief - I said it publicly. Why are you blaming me?

Oh, come on! Your tone! the exasperated rabbi shot back - it sounded like an incredulous question like you don’t believe Goldberg could be innocent!

Now it’s my tone, says Schwartz. Don’t blame me for the sound of the words, I’m a congregant, not a trained Cantor!

The Torah portion of this week Tazria, discusses the laws of an unusual illness, identified by a white patch appearing on the skin of a person, that was symptomatic of a profound emotional and spiritual blemish within this individual. This determined the person as being temporarily "impure," and required him or her to separate from the community and undergo an intense program of introspection and healing.

The Torah states that only a Kohen (priest), was authorized to diagnose a leprosy and pronounce the malady as such. Even in a case where all the symptoms of the illness are present, the person cannot be diagnosed as possessing this malady unless a Kohen states so explicitly.

Why was the Kohen so indispensable to this process? What is needed here is an expert in these illnesses and symptoms, not a priest!

More than three millennia ago the Kohanim were charged with the mission of blessing the Jewish people. To this day, there is an interval during every morning service, at which the Kohanim spread out their hands and extend Divine blessings to their Jewish brethren.

The Kabbalah explains that the reason the Kohanim were designated to be the conduit for Divine blessings is that their souls evolve from the celestial chamber of love, granting them a unique ability to cultivate compassion and kindness toward others and hence making them uniquely suitable conduits for G-d's love and grace.

This is the reason for the Jewish law that states a Kohen who is disliked by the congregation or dislikes the congregation is forbidden to bless the people, because the negative energy that surrounds this man may severely obstruct the flow of the blessings. Indeed, the blessing recited by the Kohanim before the priestly blessing states: "G-d commanded us to bless his people Israel with love."

The Kohen to be worthy of this extraordinary position, he needed to fully develop his innate capacity for love and selflessness, and it is only through marriage, in which one learns to share one's life with another human being, that a person is challenged to bring out his full potential for caring and affection.

Ultimately, you need not answer but to yourself, which is why so many people today opt for a single life. It is only in the institution of marriage that you are consistently called upon to take another person and their needs and feelings seriously. That is why it was only the Married Kohen who was charged with the responsibility of serving G-d in the Jerusalem Holy Temple.

Now we will understand why the Torah allows only the Kohen to diagnose another human being as suffering from an illness that renders him or her severely impure and requires them to separate from the community. The Torah is imparting to us a critical lesson: Before you diagnose another person as being spiritually ill and deserving temporary isolation, you must make sure that your heart is filled with love toward this person.

As parents, educators, spouses, employers, and colleagues, we often need to rebuke, denounce, criticize, and sometimes penalize. Yet all too often these are done more as an outlet for our anger and frustration rather than as a tool to help these people become the best they can be. We may call it discipline and justice, but if it is not based on kindness and the desire to help the other person, they may end up being more destructive than constructive.

Principals and teachers at times feel the need to expel a student from the institution, just as—during biblical times—the leper was dismissed from the community. Comes the Torah and declares: If you are not a Kohen, you are forbidden from issuing forth such a verdict! If you do not genuinely care for this youngster, you have no right to expel them! If you will not lose sleep over the fact that you had no choice but to dismiss a student, then it might be you who should be dismissed from your position.

It is easy to define somebody as "impure" if you do not understand their pain, but it is unethical. Before you punish, you must first learn how to be a Kohen, and how to care about others. When criticism, punishment, and even dismissal are motivated by concern for the person rather than your rage or incompetence, it will have a different effect on the person you are punishing. Your criticism will build, rather than destroy, this person's character. What is equally important, you will not cease to labor that the situation be reversed and the individual returns to his or her potential glory.

So next time before you criticize your spouse, stop and ask yourself if you are doing it as a "Kohen," out of concern and care for them, or because of your stress or anger.

If that is the case, you ought to remain silent until you can transcend your self-absorption and enter into the world of another human being.

Shabbat Shalom,

Rabbi Yoseph Geisinsky